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Post by Jamie Smith on Apr 15, 2009 18:11:36 GMT -7
Jamie listened curiously. If this woman was yanking her chain, then Jamie was falling for it. "I don't really know.." she said. She didn't She had no clue what she liked to do anymore. She hated the color blue now, feared it even. Ironic, as it had once been her favorite color. "Brown I suppose.." she said, shrugging. It was an ok color, not too lively, not too depressing. Even though Aeryn blew the smoke away a little of it caught Jamie's face and she inhaled, remembering the cigars her father had smoked every now and then. A smile quirked one of the corners of her mouth before it disappeared. She wasn't talking to her parents anymore. They were the ones who had put her in this hell..
What did she want to do when she left? Live in the desert, yet...but what else? "Live in the desert and read and ride I guess.." she said. " I wanted to be a politician, but now..I really just don't want the lime light that comes with it," she said. "Maybe I'll become a philosopher." she said, half joking half serious as she pictured herself in Greek robes like Plato. "Though I think I'll stick with my jeans.." she said, another smile quirking her face a little.
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Post by Aeryn Black on Apr 15, 2009 18:30:40 GMT -7
Good thing that the ruins in Greece and Rome are now friendly to those of us who like to wear jeans, Riding is good used to do that as a kid. The southwest would be a good place to start over really,though mind you i'm actually from England and never been but i hear that the place is lovely, there is a lot of brown there, and it's solitude, quietness even. It's a lovely idea. From now on when you feel stressed picture yourself riding a wild mustang in the desert, feeling free of all stress and worry and tell me if it helps.
Aeryn said this as she then went and butted out her cigarette.
I think that you and I should have our sessions talking like this, being honest and real with each other Jamie, I really do it's not exactly by the book but then again I have been known to do unorthodox things in the name of helping others. Off the record of course, I personally think and please don't try to act defensive but your parents are arse holes to dump you here when all you need is someone to understand and to help you see that you are a good person worthy of much more than you feel you are right now. It's not easy being rich I know, I know my parents are probably like your parents and in which they hid my sisters condition to keep their reputation in tact it's a bunch of shit to do that to someone you love.
Aeryn then just sighed a moment.She rubbed her temples softly a moment. A butterfly flew by and landed on a nearby flower and she smiled.
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Post by Jamie Smith on Apr 15, 2009 18:40:45 GMT -7
Jamie smiled again, and this time it stayed. "Well, I can't say the stress would go away. Wild Mustangs aren't the easiest things to ride.. I prefer trained Andalusians or Thoroughbreds.." she said, almost laughing. Her smiled went away again though as soon as Aeryn mentioned her parents. "I just don't understand why they did it.." she said quietly.
Jamie watched as the butterfly fluttered past. She smiled a little. It reminded Jamie of the times when she and her friends would go downtown and play at an old game arcade. They had mostly played Gauntlet Dark Legacy, finishing it within in a week and going back and changing the settings only to play again. She had been an archer, and the guardian she had had was a butterfly. That was another thing Jamie liked to do now that she thought about it. Archery was an enjoyable sport, maybe she would pick that back up once she was out. "So you rode?" she asked, remembering what Aeryn had said only a few seconds before...
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Post by Aeryn Black on Apr 16, 2009 4:43:43 GMT -7
Aeryn was silent as she listened to Jamie and she then nodded as she was told that she rode Andalusians or Thoroughbreds. Aeryn smiled at that as she for a moment just continued to look at the butterflies because there was more than one now circling the flowers.
she looked at Jamie seeming to snap out of her reverie as she heard the question. She nodded curtly and replied.
"Yes I also like Andalusian and Lipizzaners but also Arabian's they are beautiful horses are, majestic like creatures that can be so gentle and almost loving. For my Grand Madame's favor and benefit I also rode English quarter horses for awhile.
Aeryn then relaxed some more as she smiled.
It was one of the things a proper young British girl was suppose to know how to do, To ride horses properly meaning as much as I jumped and had them in equestrian exhibitions, i also learned to ride them properly because my Grand madame was very proper woman who deemed me at age six that I was very much unlady like and I don't regret putting the frog in her tea, that is to say it hopped into her tea cup whilst I was chasing it.
Good times I went to boarding school after that though, I can't complain."
She then closed her eyes a moment as she did she rubbed her temple a moment.
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Post by Jamie Smith on Apr 16, 2009 12:23:57 GMT -7
Jamie laughed a little. "I never got the chance to ride an Arabian, but yes, they are smooth movers..." she said quietly. "I had a horse once.." she said, remembering Sultan, her giant black thoroughbred sadly. "I miss him.." she said, a sad tone entering her voice as she watched the butterflies and breathed in the light air. She had found that the air inside the building behind them was so much heavier than usual...or so it felt to Jamie...
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Post by Aeryn Black on Apr 20, 2009 7:57:12 GMT -7
You will again i believe you will. I will do my best to help you be able to leave here someday. That's my goal anyways.
Aeryn told her this honestly and truly.
Butterflies reminds me of when i was little my governess we used to go and have picnics and sometimes we would sit under a tree, on a hill and there would be wild flowers Renee and i used to pretend we were fairy princesses and try to catch them. It was always fun but I always let them go and never used a net. Didn't want to hurt them.
Aeryn then smiled quietly a moment her mind going back to a moment like that then she snapped out of the image.
Truthfully i don't believe you belong in here maybe a sanitarium or such that has less violent characters around would be better for you. You know a place where there are others that can understand what it's like to be.. well you know i hate to use that word but i someday dream about opening my own clinic maybe. I don't know it's perhaps a pipe dream but me and..
she shook her head a moment.
My ex boyfriend and I were gonna run it together atleast in my dreams he was a brilliant doctor once. Then the stress and everything got to him and.. I never really understood how i wasn't the one that went insane first to be honest and yet here i am sane and I .. It was a long time ago now but the feelings never died to be honest.
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Post by Jamie Smith on Apr 20, 2009 8:34:19 GMT -7
Jamie smiled a little bit. "Well..my thing might sound a little cheesy compared to your good affiliation with the Butterfies, but I still have the same thing. My friends and I would go to the downtown arcade that was frequently deserted, and play Gauntlet Dark Legacy and once we became level 47 Ranger, we got an animal that was supposed to be our guardian and help us kill off the grunts of the higher levels. I got a butterfly when I was an archer, and the joke was that wherever my friends I went, our animals from the game where always there," Jamie said quietly, smiling. "Finally, when we turned18 we went and got tattoos of our animals as a joke right before we were supposed to go to college. My parents said not to but I did it anyway..I was tired of being their perfect angel..I have to admit I did some pretty dangerous stuff though..I started to get into street racing and other danger filled activities..." Jamie said, then was quiet for a moment, blushing. She had never admitted that she had done anything dangerous. Jamie had always been the one in her group of friends that seemed innocent..yet she had been the leader of the group...
The smile had faded from her face. "I wish I could be somewhere like that..I've even begged my parents to move me but they refuse.." she said in a hushed voice. "I don't really talk to thhem anymore and they've even stopped coming to visit me..But I like it in a way. Seeing their faces always reminded me of back home, which is something I really don't want to remember.." Jamie said... She glanced over at Aeryn. "It doesn't sound like a pipe dream...why shouldn't you be able to start your own place? After all, this is a free country, and no one cares what you do so long as you don't hurt anybody..." Jamie said in a protesting voice to Aeryn. Jamie was quiet for a moment before asking in a half serious, half joking tone. "Anyway, who's president now? I was watching the election the other night, but fell asleep right before they got the rest of the votes in.." Jamie said. She was still eager to watch politics, but she didn't want to be in it herself...well...maybe she did...Who knew??
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Post by Aeryn Black on Apr 20, 2009 9:55:02 GMT -7
Aeryn smiled a moment as she did she just shook her head.
yes but the dream died when I lost him. Anywyas if i do I will make sure that you are moved there believe me. As for the president. Ummm Barack Obama a demorcat from Illinois won the election I get to vote this year, it was the night they brought in Cameron and I forgot to go vote. Kinda with his paperwork and stuff I just..
Aeryn was silent a moment.
I think it's awesome to get a tattoo for that reason something to remember that time by. i have one on my lower back a rose and a heart and that's there to remember someone too. one day i'll have it finished add a name to it and all just been working so much here lately it just. i get tired is all.
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Post by Jamie Smith on Apr 20, 2009 10:56:52 GMT -7
"I'm sorry.." Jamie said quietly as Aeryn told her she had lost her boyfriend. As to the president... Jamie groaned. "Oh no...Anybody but him, that liberal socialist.." she said, wrinkling her nose slightly. 'I would have voted for Huckabee in the preliminary voting but I..I didn't feel like going out.." Jamie said. She nodded. "I can imagine that you get tired, having to deal with Chuckles and all the others and I.." she said quietly...
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Post by Aeryn Black on Apr 20, 2009 11:05:13 GMT -7
Aeryn shook her head and laughed. I actually would have voted for hucklebee as well but like i said i didnt get a choice in the matter really. i had to make sure they weren't abusing Cameron.
she looked down as she said this and she shook her head a moment.
Your not so bad honestly, neither is Cameron or eric or.. Dru has her moments but.. yes he's a monster isn't he? scares me a bit myself even."
She then sighed quietly. She closed her eyes and for a moment a flash of memory passed her eyes.
Have you ever been in love so bad it hurts inside you, but it's better to be with them cause they make you complete?" She asked knowing the topic was going way off and out there.
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Post by Jamie Smith on Apr 20, 2009 11:21:44 GMT -7
Jamie nodded. "He scares me too," she said, her voice hushed and a little frightened. Had she ever loved someone like that? "No, I haven't," she said, shaking her head a little. she had had a boyfriend, but it was nothing she had had ideas of pursuing, especially now..."Why?" she asked...
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Post by Aeryn Black on Apr 20, 2009 11:38:40 GMT -7
Aeryn for a moment took a calm breath and she smiled.
"If you find that one hold on no matter what and never let it go ever. "
she then for a moment just smiled despite the feeling of loss just thinking about it.
"You need to stay as far away from Chuckles as you can, He';s very bad even unnerves me. I know that he's cruel and vile and horrible. I don't know how other people can ignore his rude behavior and just ignore it or excuse it.
she then took another calming breath as she just tried to relax.
"It would serve him right if Cameron turned and killed the bastard.'
she didn't realize she had said this aloud however.
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Post by Jamie Smith on Apr 20, 2009 11:59:08 GMT -7
Jamie nodded twice, once to Aeryn's comment on love and the other to her comment on Chuckles. "I will.." she said quietly. She glanced over at Aeryn for a moment. "It would..." she said quietly. She still hated that man for what he had tried to pull with her...
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Post by Aeryn Black on Apr 20, 2009 13:10:51 GMT -7
Aeryn just nodded then she gasped and covered her hand with to her mouth a moment.
I.. yeah I shouldn't have said that but yes, He should and for that I'd look the other way about it. I should say that or feel that way but i honestly do.
Aeryn grew quiet a moment then she sighed.
Cameron.. He may have gone crazy but he wasn't always like that and the good i can say is he never raped anyone.. I couldn't love him if he did do that. Yes I'm in love with him we dated for a while back in school and early in our careers.. He was and still is my first love.
She said this her voice slightly trembling.
chuckles is a bastard a real sick piece of S*it that i really hate with my whole being and yet I am suppose to try and heal him. He can't be saved though.
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Post by Jamie Smith on Apr 20, 2009 13:23:45 GMT -7
Jamie couldn't help but bite back a smile. "I won't tell anyone.." she said, biting her bottom lip. She paused. 'He...he was your boyfriend?" Jamie asked curiously. She had never seen anything between them, and it surprised Jamie that they had date... She nodded though, growing serious. 'He is...' she quietly agreed with Aeryn. "But I'm so afraid of him...He gives me goosebumps and just doesn't seem...human.." she said quietly...
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