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Post by Jamie Smith on May 8, 2009 21:05:05 GMT -7
Jamie sobbed a little, feeling horrible about what happened in the four months following the party. "I shouldn't have done that.." she said. She thought about what happened. "I really shouldn't have done that.." she sadly, tears still rolling down her face. "But I was so scared.." she said, almost whispering...
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Post by Aeryn Black on May 11, 2009 19:51:21 GMT -7
Aeryn gave her a hug and tried to soothe her as she did she tried to understand what the other girl was feeling but knew she couldn't completely and to say she understood would be a lie.
i can't understand everything you went through , but I can understand the trama a little bit. We all make mistakes Jamie and learn to live with them
she then tried to figure out how to calm her down.
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Post by Jamie Smith on May 14, 2009 8:59:01 GMT -7
"But you don't even know what I did," Jamie sobbed. "I did the most horrible thing... But I just wasn't ready, and if my parents had found out.." she said, tears rolling down her face. This was sure to confuse Aeryn, since Jamie's parents knew about the rape, but not the after effects...
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Post by Aeryn Black on May 23, 2009 20:33:12 GMT -7
aeryn was quiet and tried to be strong for Jamie. whatever it was Jamie, it can't be too horrible really.. I mean you've gone through so very much and I know that if it was me, I'd be worse than you are now, my own sister was She sighed as she tried to cheer up Jamie but sensed it wasn't one of those situations.
Aeryn was just quiet as she thought on it a moment.
if you ever want to talk on it i'm all ears, well figuratively if i were that would be disgusting wouldn't it?" she asked.
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Post by Jamie Smith on May 24, 2009 13:45:39 GMT -7
Jamie gave a choking half sob, half laugh before she went silent for a few moments, tears still rolling down her face. "I had an abortion, but no one else knows and I feel so bad..." she blurted out quietly. "I just wasn't ready to be a parent, much less a single parent... And it was just too much with Sultan gone and the rape happening again..." Jamie said. She took a deep breath then crumbled again, more tears running down her face.
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Post by Aeryn Black on Jun 10, 2009 19:23:02 GMT -7
Aeryn was quiet she didnt know what it felt like and knew that if it were her she'd probably had done the same not knowing if the child was going to be healthy or end up like it's rapist father.
She nodded as she hugged Jamie and tried to soothe her.
" I have no idea what that choice has made you feel or what it feels like to lose something like that, but i am and please don't take this the wrong way. i feel that you made the right decision and was wise in doing so because you weren't readuy and you knew it jamie and made the best choice, i myself i have no idea what I would have done to be honest. But i do know you did what was right for you and you shouldn't feel guilty about it anymore. I know that when you lose someone even as simple as a unborn child, it hurts, It never leaves you the pain but it would have been worse if it had been born and you resented or feared it.
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Post by Jamie Smith on Jun 12, 2009 20:38:19 GMT -7
Jamie nodded slightly, tears still rolling down her face. "But I killed someone...Even if was slightly indirect.. I killed them..." she said, still crying. This had cut her so deeply that it was almost shocking. Jamie had always been against abortions until then. She had been so frightened that she had done something that she didn't believe what was right. And now that she looked back on it, it looked too extreme...
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Post by Aeryn Black on Aug 4, 2009 7:47:52 GMT -7
Aeryn walked over and hugged her friend as she did she closed her eyes and tried to find something to say to comfort her but no words came.
She felt herself wanting to cry too because in a sense this reminded her so much of her own sister and she just wondered a moment where Damien was, her nephew but she'd keep that to herself for now.
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Post by Jamie Smith on Aug 4, 2009 8:30:23 GMT -7
Jamie curled up ever so slightly in Aeryn's arms, feeling horrible, abandoned by her parents, and guilty as hell. Fifteen minutes later, Jamie pulled away, her eyes red and puffy and sniffling. "I think..I think I'm alright now.." she said, her voice scratchy from crying...
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Post by Aeryn Black on Aug 4, 2009 9:12:38 GMT -7
Aeryn just nodded and allowed Jamieto cry as she needed to and she then handed her a handkerchief.
"Well you needed to get it out, and no problem that's what friends are for hon"
Aeryn then tried to cheer her up. She then told her quietly.
I'm a virgin yes it's shocking someone my age right? In my case i have no idea what that feels like, with my sister she was catatonic in the end, she had Damien and i've been searching for him ever since, I'd adopt him straight out if I could. In my sisters case she ended up hating the baby and dying in fear. I don't want to see that happen to you, "
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Post by Jamie Smith on Aug 4, 2009 10:08:13 GMT -7
Jamie took the handkerchief and wiped her nose slightly. She listened as Aeryn told her about her sister. "I'm so sorry about you're sister..that's terrible.." she said quietly, her eyes big and round...
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Post by Aeryn Black on Aug 4, 2009 11:37:24 GMT -7
Aeryn nodded as she did she smiled despite the painful memory.
It's ok it was a while ago when we were 16 she was my twin, kinda wish i had been old enough to adopt my nephew but.. well was only 17 at the time. "
She then took a calming breath.
So lets talk about something happy now shall we? ummm hmmmm what to talk about?
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Post by Jamie Smith on Aug 4, 2009 17:47:58 GMT -7
"Something happy?" Jamie asked, feeling her shoulder where her tattoo was, like she always did when she was thinking about her friends, about happy things.. "Well..there's always the fact....that we have tacos.." she said, shrugging...
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